some good news!

We heard from our realtor today. Someone more capable got a hold of our paperwork for closing and is pushing it through. We should be closing by end of next week or sooner. WhooHoo!!

We also have found a house we really like (hint hint Mandy) and will start looking more intently on possibly purchasing. This is quite a mood lifter for me in the midst of the waiting.

Soon I will be screaming in big bold letters that we have closed. Can't wait!!

the weight of sadness

I'm feeling that weight this morning. As soon as I woke up I was keenly aware that I should have been in SC closing the deal and I immediately became sad. It is a good thought to know that the contract hasn't fallen through and is just on hold, so to speak, but this is another day of a disappointed excitement. It just makes me sad. I didn't expect to feel so bummed today since the contract is still good. If Brannon wasn't here I would probably take school off and engross myself in a good book (the Bible being one). Accountability, it stinks sometimes. Anyhow, I'm asking God to restore my joy in this waiting. Thanks for your prayers.

......And we wait

We won't be closing tomorrow. Big surprise. I'm sorry, that is not the right attitude. Act as if I didn't say that. Ok, God has informed us that it is not time yet. The bank is the hold up this time. Everything is in order but the underwriter is backed up and so they asked for an extension. We don't know when we will close. So we wait, more.

Because the house is still listed in MLS, there have been some calls about it. It may actually show this weekend or next week and if we were to get another offer that was better, we can pursue that.

So, God has us waiting for some reason, either to give us something better or to make us more dependent on Him, or both.

And, so we wait.

thanks for the prayers!

3 days

So, I mentioned in the last post that we were waiting to hear that the buyers got their papers in. They did in fact get them in last Thursday, so I'm feeling much better about that. As of now, we will be closing sometime Friday. I think the wood inspection still has to be done b/c apparently it is a last minute thing. I believe that's all that's left. We are so close. Please pray that if it all falls through again, that we will persevere as we have done thus far, and that we will pick our heads right back up and keep looking forward.

As far as our family growth is concerned: Jeff feels strongly that we are to have more of our own before pursuing adoption. This was quite surprising to me but I am rejoicing that he is leading this and has this conviction. This was definitely from the Lord. When I return from Romania in Aug. we will begin to look into the next step (a reversal). Whoa, so strange to say(type) that 'out loud'. But there it is.

Moving of Mountains

So, this is the big week! There was some hope of the closing happening this past week, but obviously it didn't and that's ok. I'm somewhat apprehensive though, because on Thursday the buyers were suppose to get some paperwork in to the bank and we haven't heard if in fact they did. I would really feel better if that was confirmed. But, nonetheless, we are scheduled to close this Friday! My heart is hestitant to celebrate but wants to so badly. We won't consider a victory in this matter until we walk away from closing having handed the keys over. But what a glorious moment it will be.

Among other topics, we are still praying for what God has in store for our family and its growth. I am basically waiting to see what God reveals to Jeff. He is the head of our home and God will give him direction. I'm anticipating something exciting!

Prayer need: we are unsettled in the home we are renting now but aren't financially prepared to make an immediate move, though we desire to. God would have to move mountains for us to finally be able to move forward to our own home anytime soon. So that's my prayer request, that God would move mountains on our behalf.

When a Heart Changes

It has amazed me how many times God has taken a set beat in my heart and sent it into motion. Just when I thought I had myself figured out, He steps in and reminds me that I am His and not my own. There have been times when I have seen something in me that I didn't like and begged God to change it. There have been times when I've learned something from scripture that gave me a new look at myself and I've prayed for God to line me up with it. And then there have been times when God revealed to me that He did not agree with my stance and He just began to make the change in me when I least expected it. That's where I am at now.

As you have, maybe, already read, we have been praying about adoption. So, last week Jeff and I had some time to sit and talk about all that is going on in our hearts. We discussed many aspects of where our hearts are. It was a really good conversation which helped me understand a little more what he was thinking. Now, expanding our family is a new thought for us. We decided about 6 years ago that we were through growing our family and took action to "seal that deal". Neither one of us has ever looked back on that decision. Until now. God began to show me that I have more than enough to offer for just my two, and there are many, many who are in need. My heart has grieved for kids out there who are unloved, undernourished, and hopeless. How can I not respond when I have so much? How can I not be a part of revealing the Ultimate Hope? To me, it is disobedient. God has made clear in His word that believers are to care for those I described above. And so I began to discuss with Jeff my desire for adoption and God has communicated with us both on this issue.

Then it sorta took a turn during that great conversation we were having. First, prior to that night, I had shared with Jeff that I was feeling regret over having interrupted the incredible miracle of conception. He and I watched a video that detailed the indescribable achievement of God's handiwork which occurs in the development of life and it only serves to bring complete praise to Him. And we took that away. Now, I want to be clear that I believe God is in control of all things no matter what I do in disobedience or ignorance. He is way bigger than my foolishness so if I ever mess up, it never messes Him up. He can supersede any of my decisions at any time. But I also believe that He wants us to experience every aspect of Him. When we surrender EVERYTHING to Him we experience Him fully.

So, back to that night of conversation. Jeff breaks it to me. He thinks God may be telling Him to reverse what had been done. Oh My Gosh!! Wow, God, what are You doing? So this is where we are.

One way or another, our family has growing to do and I'm thrilled about it. My heart is in an unfamiliar place but it is an adventure and I'm anxiously anticipating what God has in store! Stay tuned for the rest of the story and I would really love to hear from anyone who has been where we are!