We Have Entered a New World......

The world of fostering.



I can't believe we are here. So strange to think about.



So far in my life I have had 3 things that are true of me now, that I originally never thought would be so.



1--I NEVER thought I would be a homeschooling mom. Makes me chuckle still, even after 6 years of it.



2--I never thought I would be married to someone in full time ministry. I've always loved everything about church. It has continued to be a major force in my life. But, I didn't ever expect it to be on such a level. For those of you who don't know, my husband worked in the oil industry for 18 years and I was an RN. Now we both have 2 main focuses in our lives: our home (and all that it encompasses) and our church. And I dearly love both!



3--Never in a million years, would I have thought I would be a foster parent. This one surprises me the most.



And it is just so funny to me to look at the road that has brought me here. If you are completely uninterested in this part of my life you should "x out" now. For the rest of you, here's looking back:



During high school and into college, all but one job (out of 3 or4) involved childcare. I was always taking care of other people's children and learned a lot of how to meet the needs of different children. In nursing school I worked with one family providing care for 2 children whose dad didn't live with them and mom worked full time. As a nurse I worked in the well baby nursery and with postpartum moms, often working with foster and adoptive situations. (Even then, never imagined myself as one of those moms involved in such). Also never imagined that God was exposing me to my future.



As a married adult I took care of a friend's newborn, plus my two, so that she could work.

Several years ago Jeff took care of a friend's 3 kids, plus our two, every Sun. night so that we could be with students for Bible Study.

Last year I took in my nephew as an addition to our homeschooling program while he suffered from a medical condition which kept him out of his regular school.

God has used us time and again to provide for children who weren't necessarily "ours". I've never thought much about this aspect of our lives, but now I see it as all pieces of this puzzle unfolding before us.

There are many other ways in which God has set the stage of fostering for us. And I think He will continue to reveal more as time goes by.

I realize that fostering is so much more than babysitting. But God has been teaching us for so long how to love those, who come our way non-traditionally sometimes, as our own. And I can see how he has created Cody and Macie to follow suit. In fact, they are both so much ahead of us in this that they are teaching us a few things.

Yesterday, we as a family, had the incredible opportunity to serve our friends in a very small way. I think the way my kids served them the most was in the way they ministered to their kids.

I have not taught my kids to love others the way they do. I wish I could say differently but then I would miss God's great design. He has put something in them that causes them to love other kids and to have compassion for others. Friends, we may try but you can't teach some things.

I haven't taught Macie to deny herself and to put all her energy into a one year old boy no matter how exhausted she is. Yet, she showed me yesterday that she wanted to serve him no matter what it asked of her. "Macie, can you change his diaper? Macie, can you get that piece of food he dropped? Macie, can you take him into the other room and jump with him on the bed? Macie, do this. Macie, do that. Macie, why is he crying?" And so on and so on. She never complained, never rolled her eyes. This was all while she was trying to eat her own meal. I don't think it's because she is that cooperative. It's because God made her to love other kids selflessly. Why? For such a time as this.

And Cody follows the same pattern. Watch him light up when Sonya catches his eye or Olivia gives him a grin.

I haven't taught Cody to love other cultures and races. He was born to.

They both are true servants and please know I don't say that pridefully. I know I haven't exhibited in my life what I see in theirs.

God was working in them to work on me.

When we started this process, I basically took the stance of "our family won't be able to handle taking in kids like that"; or "can't we just adopt and be done?" But God has been showing me that our family was meant for this.

I'm still scared of this fostering world. I'm still unsure of what's ahead but I know we are doing what we are supposed to be and I can't wait to learn more from my kids as they teach me how to deny myself for the sake of others.

I know it is likely that you have read or heard this passage of scripture before. Please read it again. God is reminding me of it's truth and He is expecting me to serve Him by serving others. He is expecting us all to do so.

"Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.' Then the righteous will answer him, saying, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you , or naked and clothe you? And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?' And the King will answer them, 'Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.'

Taking a "side trip"

We are getting closer to being at that place where we are comfortable with jumping in to adoption. We have 2 debts that we want to pay off first. One is almost gone!! Praise the Lord!

The other is a little more daunting then the first, but God has a history of proven faithfulness. He has called us to increase our family and provide for those who are in need. I know that, because it is His direction, He will clear the path that we may walk it in obedience.

As for the adoption itself, we were at the place of finally figuring out that it should be domestic and we were feeling much more settled with fundraising attempts. However, no matter how much I fight the pull towards fostering, God just will not leave me alone about it. Jeff has always been completely fine with the idea of being a foster family. Me....not at all.

I see fostering as a revolving door type of home. I don't want that. Just being honest here. I want to be a forever home for a child who may never know what a home is like apart from me. I want a child in need of a father to meet my husband, who is phenomenal as a husband and a dad. I want a child who needs a brother and sister to know my Macie and my Cody, who will love and accept him or her as their own.

We all have so much love for this child that we have never met. And the thought of meeting this child for a possible temporary relationship is so hard to imagine.

But then God says, "is this for you or for the child?"

And I have to take a hard look at my motives.

I pray that if God truly leads us to foster that He would allow it to be a situation that leads to adoption. Oh how I pray that.

So with all that said, we will be taking the fostering classes this spring before we move forward in any other ways. Hopefully at the end or even before, we will have a clear picture of God's desire for us.

Side note: Please notice the dresses I have for sale. These profits will help us to continue to move forward with whatever adventure we are headed for.

What's Ahead in 2010?

2009 was filled with trials. God allowed some difficult things to happen, not only in my immediate family but my extended family as well. It has been a year of sincere dependence on Him, and some much needed growth in our lives. We have all been stretched beyond our comfort zones and I give thanks for His work in us.

And apparently He still desires to stretch us more......He has put the desire in our hearts to grow our family. I have posted on this before as we began to discuss it, actually about 2 years ago. I don't think I posted much on it until around the spring of last year when we began to talk with more commitment in our hearts.

Several years ago, 7 years to be exact, we decided that 2 was enough. Our family was very comfortable. We had the blessing of having a boy and a girl and they were a great difference in ages. We were content and saw no need to let "fate" control our situation. By-the-way, I don't believe anything in life is controlled by some kind of fate, but only by the complete sovereignty of God, Creator. So how I thought a small surgery would keep Him from completing His plan for me is so ridiculous. And I actually began to pray that God would bypass any thing we had done to prevent pregnancy. He didn't choose to. So what then?

I knew our family wasn't done and Jeff agreed. We didn't really know what that meant though, adoption or fostering. We have been working through this decision for almost a year and we have had many stages to go through. We had a time of being still, and of waiting for God. We have had a time of research and anticipation. It has all culminated to a clear direction from Him that it is time.

And so.....we are in the very early stages of beginning an adoption. We are looking at a domestic private adoption. We have a specific financial goal we are trying to meet before we enter into a contract to begin the actual process of adoption. If you want to know 'why domestic' look back at my post in Aug. where I describe the lessons I learned in Romania. Also, God said so :).

Please pray for us as we are anxious to get this adventure started but know there are things to take care of first.

By the way, God may have said no to bypassing our mistake, but He has made clear why: a child exist or will exist that will not have what he/she needs unless someone says "we have room for you". That is the heart of our family; we have room.

Why Christmas Means So Much To Me

I have wanted to write so much more about Christmas than I have had time to. My heart is drawn to Christ during this time, more so than any other. I have found myself thinking more and more of Him who we celebrate. But, the thing I have thought most about is the fact that we barely celebrate Him at all.



If you took a survey about Christmas, especially among Christians, you would hear that it is the season in which we celebrate His birth. Yet, so much of the things going on around me have very little to do with Him.



It saddens me.

I have kids and I get so excited about buying them things. I look forward to seeing them showered with gifts on Christmas morning. We talk alot about their wish list almost daily and I'm so thankful for a time when I can focus on them in a way I'm not able to other times of the year.



But, what does any of that have to do with Christ?



Everything!!

Why do I shower them in gifts every December 25th? Is it because Santa deemed them worthy and I got the go ahead from him? Could they have possibly been good enough to earn such wealth of things? And what exactly is "good enough". What is the standard there?

I can tell you it is not because anyone deemed them good, it is not because they earned it, and it certainly is not because they met the standard of any man on this earth. I hope they never aim to meet the standards of the world. It is because I love them the way Christ loves me and it is because He gave me the greatest gift I could ever ask for........His life.

You see, I could never be good enough, could never earn what I've been given, could never meet the standards set for me. But, God knew that, so He set a plan in motion to redeem me. That redemption came through Christ. It is because of that Gift that I shower my kids in gifts. I want them to understand what unearned love is like. I want them to know how to accept free gifts and then to live lives in gratitude to the giver.

This is my goal. I want to live in response to the gift I've been given. I want my children to do the same.

Please be reminded this season that there is so much more to celebrating Christmas than a man in a red suit. He is fun, but he is not eternal. He may be known for giving gifts and doing good for others, but he didn't give his life in death so that you and I could live. That is Christ and He deserves the glory!!

Here are some scriptures to help us remember what He has done for us:

All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through redemption that is in Christ Jesus. Romans 3:23-24

For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 6:23

For grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. Ephesians 2:8-9

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change. James 1:17

Thanks be to God for his inexpressible gift! 2 Corinthians 9:15

Prayer Request for a friend

I just wanted to put a plug out there for my dear friend Emily and her incredible family, all of which are dear to us. They are nearing the end (praise God) of their adoption journey. They have one final thing that has to happen: pass the courts. In order to do that, they need a court date scheduled. Please pray that those in authority would move quickly and their hearts would continue to be stirred for the families waiting on the other side of a very big ocean for their child to come home.

2 reasons for this specific request:
1-Courts are closed all of Dec. If there's no date in November, they will have to wait until after the New Year. Readers......they have seen her face, they know her in every way possible right now. Can you imagine what it would be like to know your son or daughter is waiting for your love when you have seen her and loved her for so long already yet you can't get to her? Not a fun place to be....

2-As soon as they get a court date they can purchase airline tickets and get all the travel plans set. Beginning Dec. 1st, cost of tickets literally triple. Triple I say! We're talkin a whole new fundraiser and there isn't time for that.

So, please pray for them.

If you want the full scoop on their story go to the blog listed on my list as "Journey to Rwanda"

Thanks Friends!